Still Waiting

Still waiting........all week long my car has been with my mechanic, Mike. I am trying not to be too concerned about how much money it is going to cost to get my car. He ended up doing a lot more work on my car than he had anticipated, and that has got me worried. He said he is being very generous with his time, and promised not to leave me broke, and didn't want to leave me stranded. He is a great guy and I believe him to be an honest person. My concern, however, is that I will be living a life of indentured servitude for quite some time. I don't have any extra money lying around, so I had to ask for an advance for work to be performed. I have done it before and it has worked to everyone's advantage, however, it is difficult for me to be in this position.

One of the more difficult challenges with which I am currently presented with, is the inability to travel at will. I was hoping to be able to go down to Visalia to visit with Mi Abuelita, but since I didn't have my car, nor means to rent a vehicle, I was bound to the vicinity of San Jose. I love San Jose, but my desire to travel and visit with family was also very great.

Please don't misunderstand, I am not complaining, or asking for sympathy. I am simply expressing the emotional aspects of the current challenges ocurring in my life. My life is absolutely blessed one hundred times over, and I have great faith in my Heavenly Father. I worry a little, but with the knowledge and faith that all will be cared for in some way, minimizes my fear. I am human and do err, so I worry.

There has not been a time in my life (within the last six years) that I have worried so extensively for my well-being that I fell into a pit of despair of self-pity or sorrow. My strong conviction in the plan of salvation and of my Heavenly Father's love for me and all of His children, keeps me pushing forward. I once told Rene (a.k.a. NeNe), when she asked me why things always seemed to work out for me, even when we had very little money for food, and my reply was simple:
"I know, that my Heavenly Father loves me. I know, that as long as I am doing my best to live righteously, and to live the commandments, not just on Sunday, but every day, he will bless me. Having faith in God and His son Jesus Christ, and actively living the gospel by doing as Christ would do, and what God wants us to do is a powerful thing. He will bless me and even though we have difficult times, it's what we take away from the experiences that bring forth the greatest lessons in life."

Faith! Blind faith, even, is all it takes. Even when I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, I know, I have faith, that there will be an end and that I will get there if I keep pushing forward. My old Bishop used to quote a scripture all the time. It was one of his favorites, it reads:

"I, the Lord, am bound when ye do what I say; but when ye do not what I say, ye have no promise."

Which means, when you pray and receive an answer and act with faith, by following the promptings of the Spirit, you will be blessed. Whenever you make and keep a covenant with God, He is bound to bless you. It's an amazing, beautiful thing! :) I am so grateful to have a family I love, and good friends in my life that I may not be lonely away from family. Life is an amazing opportunity to learn how to be happy, to educate our minds and souls, to increase our capacity to have compassion and love. I am so blessed to have a wonderful family.

erika j