Closure...

You know, I've been moving for the last three weeks. It was probably one of the most difficult moves for me (and I've moved a lot). However, with all that was difficult, the sliver lining here, is the fact that I have my own place. No roommates. This is an exciting time for me, as far as living arrangements go. Right now, the unpacking is kicking my butt and having to downsize to accommodate my small but mighty studio has been brutal. I love that I have my own place, but I'm still so tired from the past few weeks.

Yesterday, was the first time I was able to talk to anyone about Vince going missing. I talked to Kelly, because she was the only one I felt comfortable talking to. It was tough, because when I first found out he was missing, I wasn't ready to talk about it, and then when I felt I needed to talk, we were at the beach for FHE with my ward, and I don't know anyone in my ward that I would feel comfortable talking to about it. It weighed me down considerably. On top of that, aside from maybe one person, no one knew him anyway. I also "talked" to Amy for a few minutes. They are on vacation, and I know Arthur is really bummed. I had to ask Amy to give him a hug from me.

I finally was feeling closure on the move from the Snow House, and now....we wait for closure with Vince. When the MV bishop called Scott...my heart stopped, as I waited to hear the latest. I can only pray that the Lord comforts his parents and family.

ej

It's interesting how every person falls into a different category. Let me explain. We all fall under different categories of various personality types. According to Meyers-Briggs, I am classified as an INTJ. This means I like to have a system, and that I ask the question "Why not?" when others are still asking "Why?" People ask me why I found and engaged in a new hobby, and don' t understand why I "do what I do." I realize that I am not the most conventional thinker, or do-er in normal society, so I have to work hard not to give others too much of a hard time. I have a t-shirt that probably describes the way I think, pretty well.

"I'll try to be nicer, if you try to be smarter."

This is very much the heart of all my troubles in relationships and the difficulties I face at work. I love my job. I enjoy what I do, and those I work with. Sometimes, the way others form "logical reasoning" on how to approach a project, really, really, really...yes one more, really frustrates me. In fact, this morning I was speaking with one of the partners at work and we were trying to come to an understanding on one of the technical drawings for a project we were working on. We went in circles on how to approach it, how we could have avoided it, how it could be handled in the future, etc. At one point of the conversation, he stopped and looked me in the eye and said, "We have completely different ways of thinking!" I nodded my head in agreement, then smiled.

He was absolutely right! I am a upper left brain thinker (way, way, way upper left), and he is more on the lower right (this is strictly my own evaluation). We clash as thinkers and in the way we like to get things done. I think he is inefficient and "scatter" brained, he thinks I'm too organized and analytical. I think that he would get more done by doing it, rather than talking about it in their daily sales meeting. That's just me! Sometimes, I struggle to remember that everyone thinks differently, and that it makes "sense" to them. I have a low tolerance for things that don't make sense to me. Something I am aware of and work on everyday.

Perhaps the most fundamental problem, however, is that INTJs really want people to make sense. (cited from http://typelogic.com/intj.html )

If you're interested, take the online personality test: http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp

ej

Hello, Land of the Unknown

Sometimes, I wonder why we blog??? For me, it is a way to write my thoughts and not care whether someone reads them or not. I do enjoy comments, but I enjoy writing for myself. Sometimes, what I write inspires me to want to be better. Seeing my feelings on the page makes me see clearly and without clouded emotion about things that are going on in my mind. When I read back upon what I have written I see pieces come together, or see how emotion kept my mind from seeing the solution, or the problem.

When I was younger, I used to write so many stories about faraway lands, or historical places that I wanted to visit, and the adventures I had while there. It seems that same type of imagination I had when I was a child has faded, but my desire to write has not. Hopefully, I will begin to write more often, and tap into the deep place in my mind and heart!

ej